Will Smith Vowed To Satisfy Jada Pinkett Sexually Or Die Trying... That Makes Them A Great Couple!!

There's been a lot of talk about Jada Pinkett Smith and Will Smith recently, specifically about their marriage. More specifically, of the negative times. After over a year of continued stories in the news about "entanglements" and "embarrassments," it seems like a lot of people are just done hearing about the couple, and are calling them a lost cause.

Or, if they're incredibly sexist, doing this nonsense:

Actually though, whether you're tired of hearing about their relationship or not, what we're currently seeing from Will Smith and Jada Pinkett Smith is actually just how strong their relationships is - because if they've been able to get through this to the point where they can publicly talk about it, there's truly no other explanation.

Between Will Smith's recent Oprah interview for Apple TV, previews from his upcoming memoir, and all the discussions Jada has had on Red Table Talk, they've actually been modeling exactly what makes a couple that can stand the test of time, in basically three steps:

1. They clearly had the initial base chemistry.

As Smith details in his new memoir, the connection between himself and Jada Pinkett was instantaneous - and passionate. Oprah read this portion aloud ahead of their interview:

"We drank every day, and had sex multiple times every day, for four straight months," Smith says in his memoir, set for release on Tuesday, according to Winfrey. "I started to wonder if this was a competition. Either way, as far as I was concerned, there were only two possibilities: one, I was going to satisfy this woman sexually, or two, I was going to die trying."

That spark and passion are the foundation of a relationship, although many don't burn quite that quickly - others might criticize that level of intensity as making up for a lack of ability to communicate, but that's clearly not the case for them. He told Oprah:

"I've never met another person that I connect with in conversation more blissfully and productively than Jada." That's the rosebud of a great relationship right there.

2. They set clear ground rules and boundaries with each other - even if those rules seem strange to others.

The couple learned to do this in communication quite early: In one episode of Red Table Talk, Smith described the first moment they opened up that line of communication, after his not-yet-wife cursed at him during a game of Pictionary.

"I was like, 'Jada, this is the deal. I grew up in a household where I watched my father punch my mother in the face, and I will not create a house, a space, and interaction with a person where there is profanity and violence," Smith said. "If you have to talk to me like that, we can't be together. We're not going use any profanity in our interactions. We're not going to raise our voice. We're not going to be violent. I can't do it.'"

There's been a lot of controversy about how the pair addressed their famous "entanglement" scandal last year, but what a lot of people miss is that regardless of what they may have done in the past, it's more important that they work with their own limitations to make the relationship work for them.

Jada Pinkett Smith has said on record that she doesn't think she was "built for conventional marriage, and Will Smith recently revealed that when a tantric sex counsellor (more on that in a moment) asked the actor what would make him happy, he responded by saying: "I would have a harem," so it's quite clear that neigther of them are set out for monogamy.

But that doesn't mean they don't deserve to be married if that's what they want. They just have to make the marriage their own - which is exactly what they did when they separated after Jada called her 40th birthday party, which he planned. "the most disgusting display of ego I have ever seen in my life".

3. They understand that they also have to work on themselves.

In an interview with Oprah earlier this month, Smith called that birthday party and the days that followed the lowest point in their marriage. He realized they were unhappy, and also made the difficult decision to say it.

"We realised that it was a fantasy illusion that we could make each other happy. We agreed that she had to make herself happy and I had to make myself happy. Then we were going to present ourselves back to the relationship already happy - versus demanding that the other person fill our empty cup."

For his part, Smith turned to the aforementioned counsellor, Michaela Boehm, and a psychotropic tea called Ayahuasca, which he tried 14 times in order to get himself into an elevated headspace so that he could work on his problems without the baggage of conscious thought.

Now they're back together - and no matter what anyone says, it looks like this couple, for all their struggles, fundamentally understands what a marriage is more than many, many people: It's a foundation of love and open understanding that you build upon with trust and communication. Keeping it together is a decision, not destiny - and if you have the desire and the willpower to make the decision together, then you belong together.

Tags

Will Smith, Jada Pinkett-Smith